The lord of the Shoes!!
by Paladin level 20
Summary: I had this fic a while ago, but ff.net deleted my acount, so now I'm puttin' it back on-line. It's LOTR and The Silma with a weird twist.


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The Lord of the Shoes.

Chapter 1.

Morgoth (or Melkor) was dearly _bored_. Same thing with his loyal servant Sauron, who lived in Mordor. Suddenly, he had a "funny" idea he laughed his head off when he thought of it, and he called Sauron. Mordor was hundreds of kilometers away, but Sauron came there in two blinks' time.

"Yes, my Master, why have you called me?" Sauron asked to Morgoth, hurriedly, because he had plenty of evil things to do in his evil mini-kingdom.

"Sauri." Morgoth said.

"Yes, master."

"I want you to do something to wear for you to be as powerful as……… _me, _and others for putting under slavery the Elves, the Dwarves and Human beings. Try to corrupt 'em with that 'something to wear'. Understood?" He said clearly.

"Yes, my Master," Sauron said enthusiastically. He always accepted Morgoth's ideas, no matter how crazy they were, if Morgoth ordered Sauron to jump over a bridge, Sauron did it, as a fact, Sauron did it once or twice, but now he had a question hitting his mind " _but_……" Sauron paused.

"**BUT WHAT? AIN'T I CLEAR ENOUGH?**" Morgoth yelled, as the mad-Ainur he was.

"O, yes my master, you're clear enough, but……what shall I do?" Sauron asked fearfully.

Morgoth hadn't thought of that. "_Oh, why did I corrupt_ such _a stupid Maiar, I should've tried with that Olórin,_ **he** _had some brains on himself……… _"Morgoth muttered to himself, what he said in a lazy loud voice was the following: "Dunno, a Ring, a Shoe, a Tie…………… think it yourself, you dumb {censored}!"Morgoth said to Sauron.

Sauron left Morgoth's trone-room, and he went to Mordor, his own home with an overwhelming speed. He'd do something to wear, but what? Not a Ring, that was for sure, it would look as if he was asking their hand on marriage rather than slaving to the so-called Free People. A Tie either, everybody, (starting for himself) hated ties. So everything left was a Shoe… a Pair of Shoes… _yes_, he said to himself while he walked to the Tower in construction Barad-dûr, _a pair of shoes……_

Three Pairs for the Elven Lords beneath the sky

Seven Pairs for the Dwarven Lords who never share :(

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Nine Pairs for the Mortal Men who are doomed to die (they're really fly)

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One Pair for me, the **C**ool dude under the trone, in the land of Mordor, where orders go,

One Pair for rule 'em,

One Pair for finding 'em

One Pair for luring 'em, tying 'em on shadows and steal them all they got,

In the land of Mordor, thus begins the war.

[A/N: Cool, ain't it?]

Sauron liked the idea.

He passed where 5/6 of the Orcs he ruled were working. They were going too slow. He decided that the Pair of shoes he'd make for himself would make that construction go faster. There was a sign that Sauron himself had ordered to do. It said:

THING BEIN CONZTRUCTED: BARAD-DÛR TOWER.WE'RE WORKIN' FOR **HE**. THE ORKZ. :(

Sauron went for his own walking path, which name was, _Sauron's Walking Path. _He walked for it. He knew where it went by heart. It went from the (in construction) Barad-dûr Tower to Mount Doom. He walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and walked, and yet walked a little bit more and it appeared to be that he over-walked, because, suddenly he was in Rhûn.

"D'oh !" He exclaimed. All the Rhûn people were looking dazzled at him. One stepped forward and asked him "What are You doing here, Oh, Our Great and Magnificent an' all that staff Lord?" And all the Rhûn men made a clumsy bow and they all bumped their heads together and they all started cursing each other. 

"Pathetic" Sauron muttered to himself. Then, He shouted to the Rhûn men, who were fighting hand-to-hand with knifes. "RHÛN MEN!" He shouted. They suddenly stopped fighting. "GIVE ME TRANSPORTATION FOR GETTING TO THE ORODRUIN AND A PLASTIC BAG!" They gave him a giant parrot named "Melki" and the plastic bag. "A PIECE OF PAPER AND SOMETHING TO WRITE ON IT! NOW!" They gave Him that. "AND GLUE!" And so they gave them glue. He wrote in the paper the following text: "I'm beautiful.", then He glued it to the bag. "THANKS YOU." He said. He rode the giant parrot.

"Where shall we go today, my new master?" The parrot asked.

Startled as he was that a parrot could talk, Sauron said "Let us go to Eregion."

"O.K." The parrot said.

And it beat its monstrous wings, he gave a jump, and……… it flew!

FEMALE VOICE FROM NOWHERE IN PARTICULAR: Parrot Flight # 1254 leaving from airport. Only passenger aboard. _(Repeats countless times)_

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Well, that makes _"Lord of the Shoes"_' first chapter! Re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-read and **review, and I don't mind if you flame me, because _(he-he-he!)_ I know how to flame you**! **So, please, tell me what do you think of this fic, and if you know Spanish, I also have it in that language. If you ask, I'm a boy, bye! Oh, yeah, in next chapter the "Power Shoes" are done! Wait for it. If you want me to skip to ¨The good Hobbit and the bad Hobbit (formerly known as _¨The Hobbit_", or to "Lord Of The Shoes", just tell me. Bye! **


End file.
